Thursday, 9 June 2011
It’s already been a month since my last mail, and I am pretty sure you’re worried. Well, don’t be. I am perfectly ok; in fact I am better than ever. I was on vacation and I traveled a lot, and I couldn’t keep in touch.
First of all, you need to know that the Royal Wedding was amazing. I told you I was going, didn’t I? My family was one of the few non royal families there. I had a blast. I even got past my crush for Prince William when I saw how bold he has gotten. My current royal target is Harry, even though he’s getting bold too. At first, I didn’t want to go to the wedding. You see, I, was going to be Kate’s bridesmaid, till Pippa’s ass beat me. I was really devastated about that change, but I got over it as soon as I found out she was her sister. You see my mom and their mom, were working as airhostesses for the same company and were both trying to find rich men to marry. The wedding party was ok, Pippa succeeded to stay decent enough and Harry left sober.
Then I went to France, for a little shopping. My mom and I bought some dresses, shoes, bags and perfumes, nothing special. The amazing thing was that my dad cheated on my mom, and in order to make her forgive him, he bought us an apartment in Paris. Isn’t that great? I am so happy for my new house; of course you are welcome to go stay whenever you want.
Next stop was Portugal. I know you’ll probably say something like Sara did; what I was doing in a country with poor and filthy people. I was actually staying in a cruising ship, so thank God I wasn’t mixed with any local. Later on, I wanted to go to Spain, but I saw on tv that it was really crowed with tourists. I can’t believe there were so many people there. You know, the hotels were probably full, because I saw that people were camping on the squares. What a pathetic thing to do. They even protest at the squares, probably asking for a room at some hotel.
I end up going to Italy, where I’ve gone a million times in the past, although I didn’t go to Milan this time. I went to Sicily, Florence, Venice and Rome. It was fine, I saw some old buildings, a flooded city and some underground graves that my brother dragged me unto. I can’t believe I went down there; it was an awfully claustrophobic place. You see my stupid brother thought he was Indiana Jones. He even tried to open a tomb and a guard had to kick us out, thank God. I know, you probably think, how a poor nobody can kick me out of anyplace. My thought exactly. That’s why I asked my dad to get him fired.
Well, after this long and tiring trip I am home at last. You see, I thought of coming to Greece for a visit but I am not sure I can get into such a cultural shock just yet.